A midwife says she doesn't want to breastfeed herself? Is that even possible?

As the founder of MORE MIDWIVES and a midwife, I'm saying I didn't want to breastfeed. Not breastfeeding as a midwife? Is that even possible?

I am a midwife.
I am a mother of two children.
And I didn't breastfeed my children exclusively for six months.

I used to be ashamed, especially with my first child. And now with my second, it was a process for me to accept that.

For me, there wasn't one single reason. It was always the overall situation. With my second child, I had a completely different postpartum experience than with my first. I was prepared, had support, and lots of help, but I still felt that breastfeeding was difficult. Because breastfeeding is natural, but it doesn't always come naturally. Maybe I was too impatient as a midwife, maybe not. I don't know. And I don't want to analyze it any further.

For me. For us as a family. It was always a good decision.

And this time, too, I breastfed "longer" than the first time. It was good for me. And yet: I don't regret anything. I don't miss anything.

I used to be ashamed because I didn't breastfeed for the full six months recommended.

It's not just "all or nothing." Breastfeeding has so many facets.

Breastfeeding is not the same as love. And those who don't breastfeed (fully) do not love any less.

Breastfeeding is emotional. Breastfeeding is work. Breastfeeding is growth, not only for the baby, but also for the mother (no matter how long).

And: I’m not a bad midwife just because I didn’t breastfeed my children for “long.”
After all, what does "long" even mean? Who defines that? Every breastfeeding relationship is unique, just like every family.

It's important that you're well-informed and well-supported. That you make a decision that's right for you and your baby, not for any outside expectations.

And no matter how you breastfeed (or don't breastfeed), you're a good mother. Period.